I avoid saying I am busy.

Frequently when I want to get a point across around what there is, or has been, to do in my life that has occupied inordinate amounts of my time I will say, “I am experiencing a full life!” And that is the truth, but am I giving lip-service to what is behind the statement? Just changing the words to support a more “spiritual” understanding doesn’t change the intention if behind the statement is the belief that my life is, “busy.”

I do engage in a lot. I keep myself very well occupied.

Here’s the question that comes up for me today: What am I giving up to maintain that pace?

This past weekend I had a lot of fullness to experience (i.e. I was VERY busy). This fullness kept me from completing some things that I enjoy. You may have noticed that a new podcast was not made available yesterday — that is because I didn’t have the chance to record it in a timely manner due to the fullness of my life! It’s not that I didn’t want to… I simply didn’t have the time because I made choices that kept me from having the time.

It’s very frustrating to me to feel like I don’t have time (which is an illusion and only the case when I make time a priority). What if I didn’t make time a factor — would I still accomplish what I want to accomplish? The real answer is, “I don’t know.” I don’t know because I have been living in the habit of prioritizing time and filling up my available hours in the day for so long I don’t really know if I can function free of the consideration of time. Theoretically I know I can — but frequently theory and practice do not meet.

So my life is definitely full!

I think it is time for me to accept a slightly more fluid relationship with time. So here is where it begins… I will post my podcast soon. I don’t know when it will be… but it will be soon.